It's Time

A few week ago, I watched a video shared on Facebook by Kathryn Paterson (watch for her new book -- I don't know when, but just google her every now and then [and, yes, this is a plug for KP]) -- images of surprise family reunions of U.S. soldiers and their families.  If only my ophthalmologist, who recently treated me for an extra-severe case of dry eye, could have seen the tears flow!  They were so flushed out that day that I thought (briefly) of foregoing the evening's eye-wash ritual.  The images themselves not only evoked the tears, but thoughts of how easily we (yes, all of us), take for granted the folks in our lives who mean (or so we say) so much to us.

Similar thoughts came to me on September 11, 2001, when 2,995+ people arrived for work, appointments or errands, at the World Trade Center in New York, for the last time in their lives.  I know of no official count that takes into consideration those who perished sometime thereafter, with the events of that date being the proximate cause of their demise.  My thoughts then, and the ones that continue to haunt me, not only about that situation, but those happening everyday are unanswered questions:  What if?  Did they? Why?

What if a hug was offered that morning and rejected?
What if an apology was tendered and not accepted?
Did they resolve that conflict and depart in peace?
Why didn't he/she/they try one more time?

Why is it so easy for us to tend to the inconsequential while we allow some of the most important aspects of our lives -- our relationships with others -- to languish?  Who/what do you blow off while making sure your nails, hair and/or makeup are flawless?  Or while you find just the right tie, shirt or cologne?  Or who did you disappoint and keep waiting while you had one more drink?  To whom did you utter empty words of endearment just to have your way with him or her?

There is no need for a soapbox speech or sermon here.  One would hope that any marginally thinking person of the least modicum of discernment would have had a light-coming-on experience if having read to this point. So, how about it folks?  Do you have a relationship in need of repair?  Attention?  Nurturing?  Resurrecting?  How much time do you think you have to start working on it?

What if . . . ?
Did you . . . ?
Why . . . .?

Now that Thanksgiving is a near but swiftly fading memory, we set our sights on Christmas.  Okay, you Believers out there -- I know I should have said Advent, but let’s face it -- from the looks of things very few folks are in a mode of expectancy.  Two days before Thanksgiving I stopped at a Walgreen’s drugstore and the clerk said Happy Holidays as I departed the counter after paying for my stuff.   

The Christmas season has become the most commercial time of the year, and each year it seems to start earlier than the year before.  This year was a little different; most stores weren’t so blatantly obvious about it.  Still, instead of the day after Thanksgiving, there was evidence of Christmas in retail stores before Halloween.  

Every year we rack our brains

Trying to find the ultimate things.

When if we just sat still awhile,

We would save quite a mile

Of running hither and thither and yonder.

Running frantically, full of wonder.

What could it be that I could get

To give ultimate pleasure without much debt?

And all the while we wonder on

If we will receive what we most want

How wouldit be if we kept the Christmas sprit throughout the year?  – gifting our family and friends and the folks we don’t know that some of us only remember in December – we call them the poor, the homeless.  What if we just gave from our hearts all through the year?  Would we be more reasonable and prudent with our resources?  Is there any other time of the year that folks typically go way overboard and beyond the bounds of their budgets?  Don't you think it be great to remember those who have less – or little – throughout the year?  

You probably won’t believe this – but I tell you it’s the truth:  you have never seen real gratitude until you given a hungry person some food -- or teach someone to read -- or help someone get a job.   And you know what I have found?  When I really feel down, one thing that can pick me up is doing something for someone else.  It’s a whole lot better than searching for that perfect present – that car – that fur coat – that humongous diamond ring – and giving it to someone who may value the thing more than he or she values you.  Don’t you think you’re worth more than a car – a fur -- or a diamond?