Wednesday, November 25, 2009

A Wealthy Woman Indeed

Thanksgiving Day 2008 marked the beginning of the end of my life as it had been for several years.  What followed were events that, even in retrospect and without experiencing the agonizing pain that accompanied them, I believe were the most egregious of my little life.  And right here, right now, on this Thanksgiving Eve 2009, I cannot help but have a profound sense of gratitude for the many ways God carried, consoled, encouraged, rescued and loved me.  He used the hands, arms, eyes, ears, feet and hearts of my family by birth and law, my family of faith at South Main Baptist Church, my business clients who are so much more than that, and two wonderfully gifted women who welcomed me into their labor of love for spreading the Good News through music.  And He used for good the acts that others meant to do me harm, all the while teaching me some painful and now much appreciated lessons.   My life is different now; a new chapter is in the making.  And most of all, I am at peace.  That makes me one of the richest people on earth -- a wealthy woman indeed.  What more is there?

My prayer for you, is that even in the darkest hour of your day, on the worst day of your life, and all others as well, that you know the peace of God which transcends all understanding, and that His peace will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

And as my pastor Steve Wells would say:  Go with God's blessings; go with God's peace.

.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Obstacles: Keeping the Main Thing the Main Thing (Part III)

Just a reminder:
  1. This writing is not about bashing your religion.
  2. This writing is not about bashing your denomination.
  3. This writing is not about bashing you.
  4. If you take offense, well, I'll finish this item 4 later . . .
In Part I of this writing, we discussed how one's appearance can be used to include or exclude one from the "table."

In Part II we talked about the woman factor -- how male dominance of today's religious organizations is based, at least in part, on a misinterpretation and mistranslation of the Scriptures.  We also talked about traditions, and how maintaining the status quo can hinder the work of the Kingdom.

Let us turn to circumstances.  What do you mean circumstances?  You know -- STUFF.   The stuff that you think YOU have to change BEFORE you accept the Main Thing.   The stuff that YOU think gets in the way of your getting to the Main Thing.

Last week, I believe, the three CSI series -- the "original" set in Las Vegas, along with the Miami and New York spinoffs, devoted their episodes for the week to a three-part story about the present-day exploitation of  young women in very ugly ways (and, frankly, some way beyond this writer's ability to conjure).  Having dutifully recorded each of the three shows, I watched them back-to-back.  A focal character, common to all three, was a young woman whose mother reported her missing.

Sidebar:  Throughout my viewing of these three episodes, I could not help but think how real the kinds of incidents incorporated into these works of fiction, really are, and that somewhere, right now in the United States, just as in other parts of the world, these things are happening for real.  I  thought of my Sunday School classmate and Facebook friend, Dr. Joan D___, whose daughter works tirelessly to fight 21st century slavery right here in the good old U.S.A.  

One can surmise that throughout the CSI three-parter, bodies and body parts were in good supply.  But at the very end, the young woman was found.  I'll spare you the gory details of all that happened to her; feel free to use your imagination.  When the young woman approaches Dr. Whomever (I don't know the CSI character's name, and it really isn't relevant), she asks:

How can I go back after all that has happened?


His reply is something to this effect:  All you have to do is walk through the door.


The young woman, via the "CSI," had received a text message from her mother which said, in essence:  I love you, I miss you, please come home, I want you back.

That really does say it all:  I love you, I miss you, please come home, I want you back.  So, I ask you this:

Have you ever done something so terrible that when you think about it you just cringe?  You might even shiver a little bit and wonder however could I have done that?  Something that you're absolutely not proud of and you a very ashamed of?  It just makes you groan inwardly when you hear about it or even think about it.  It just tears your heart out.

We've all done things of which we are not proud, of which we are ashamed.  But there is some good news here:  I am reminded of a sermon about second chances.  In this sermon were mentioned several folks --  well-known Biblical characters who are just like us.  They have problems and obstacles and challenges and successes and relationships.  And some of them abused their relationships, taking people for granted, and really messed over them, really bad.  But at the same time, those folks, when they realized the wrong that they had done, and were grievously sorry for it – do you know what they did?  They went to God and confessed their wrongdoing and asked Him for forgiveness.  And you know what?  In seeing them in their sorrow and knowing their hearts, He forgave them and gave them a second chance.


Most times, it takes more than a second chance; often there are third, fourth and even more chances - because we fall down.  The key is to get up.  God is so merciful that if your heart is sincere, He'll give you the chance you need to get up and try again.  Isn't that wonderful to know, that there is One to whom we can go, Who will wipe our slate clean and give us another chance?
 

So, how can you go back after all that has happened?  All you have to do is take the first step through that Door.  As one of my favorite songs goes:  Everytime I run back to Him, He is waiting with open arms . . .  Just as the mother waits for her wayward child to come back, even more so does the Father.  The obstacles that keep us from the Main Thing are not of his doing, but are those of others, and perhaps even yours.  The sad part is that the very ones who would serve to block others from the Main Thing, are as messed up as the rest of us.  In their ignorance, they let their rules, regulations, rituals, sorry Scriptural interpretations and traditions keep others -- and themselves -- from experiencing the joy of the Main Thing.


Well?  What obstacles prohibit you from keeping the Main Thing the Main Thing?  What is more important than being made righteous by faith in Jesus Christ?  Does your new suit do it for you?  How about those new pumps and matching purse?  Perhaps more to your liking is the ill-prepared, aliterate self-proclaimed prophet, who speaks poetically, peppering his/her verbiage with alliterative points which tickle your ears without speaking to your heart.


On the other hand, what obstacles do you cast before others that keep the Main Thing from being the Main Thing for them?   Your dress code?   The little doily things that add no significance to anything, and definitely do not serve as a conduit of justification?  Perhaps you have a residential zip code requirement?  Or, maybe everyone must look, act and speak like you?  How boring is that?

And finally,

  1. This writing is not about bashing your religion.
  2. This writing is not about bashing your denomination.
  3. This writing is not about bashing you.
  4. If you take offense, well, look in the mirror and ask yourself why.  If you deem any rule, regulation or standard you adhere to more important than anyone's relationship with the Almighty, perhaps you should rethink your position.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Obstacles: Keeping the Main Thing the Main Thing (Part II)

Just a reminder:
  1. This writing is not about bashing your religion.
  2. This writing is not about bashing your denomination.
  3. This writing is not about bashing you.
  4. If you take offense, well, I'll finish this item 4 later . . .
In Part I of this writing, we discussed how clothing can be used to include or exclude one from the "table."   But what about other exclusionary devices -- tactics -- TRADITIONS???

What about this one:

  • You simply cannot go to worship there; they have a woman for a pastor!
  • Or -- as I was told recently:  Oh, I see you're an ordained minister, but I don't allow women in my pulpit.
My Sunday School class just finished a short study of women in the Bible.  While some of the actual female characters in the Bible were discussed, the study was as much about the fallacies regarding women in the Old and New Testaments (with some mention of the Torah), the misuse and misapplication of gender in many versions of the Bible, and the effects thereof.

A little sidebar here:  Recently I happened on the website of a "church" which describes itself thusly:
We are a local New Testament church reaching the [city name] Area with the gospel of Jesus Christ. Don't expect anything contemporary or liberal. We are an old-fashioned, independent, fundamental, King James Bible only, separated Baptist church and not ashamed to say so.
My first thoughts upon reading that little snippet:  Doesn't he realize King James is a version of the Bible and not an accurate translation?  Was Jesus a fundamentalist?  Was Jesus a separatist?  If Jesus was "old-fashioned" and "separatist" how could He have possibly reached the folks whose lives he changed, and who in turn lived the Great Commission?  How could he sit "at table" with loose women and tax collectors and all those other sinners?  Just curious.   


As a child, I wondered why pulpits were populated by men -- and only men; why women ministers were curiosities and had celebrity status; why women were systematically assigned to missionary work as if being called thusly was not as significant as being called to preach the Gospel.  Why did all women go to "mission" meetings and men to "brotherhood" meetings?  Were men ever missionaries?  Did women ever have "sisterhood" meetings?  

So, what's the deal?   This writer sees it like this:  Sometimes traditions are perpetuated to maintain the status quo, thereby depriving others -- in this case, women -- access to all of the rights, privileges and responsibilities, of being true believers in The Way, The Truth, The Life -- in Jesus, the Christ.  In Galatians, Paul makes clear that we are one in Jesus Christ -- that there is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female (Galatians 3:28).  So, why do some folks insist on defining a believer's role in the building of the Kingdom God based on one's gender?  Simple.  One can-be-and-in-this-case-is-nasty little word:  TRADITION.


Were one to take a look at the big picture, one might agree with this writer:  WE SIMPLY DON'T HAVE TIME FOR SOME TRADITIONS.   The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. (Luke 10:2).  There are more people on the face of the earth than ever before.  There are more churches on the face of the earth than ever before.  Still, we lose ground with petty territorialism, insecurities and jealousy, because:

  • The Church is not your church
  • Those who are lost do not have the luxury of waiting for you to choose your successor
  • Your successor is not necessarily your biological son (the laws of descent and distribution of your state do not apply to God's Kingdom)
  • Your son in the ministry is not yours (God has children, not grandchildren)
  • Even if you/your family own the real estate on which your subset of the Family of God meets for worship, study and fellowship, it is still not yours (the earth is the Lord's -- and everything in it)
  • Yes, there are actually others who have studied the Word and have something substantial to impart to God's people.  They study with their hearts and minds, not their genitalia.  Their filter is the Holy Spirit, not their hormones.

 Note to pastor who informed me that he does not allow women in his pupit:  Where is GOD in YOUR pulpit? And what makes you think I want to be anywhere near YOUR pulpit?


While I do not advocate abdicating our sense of how to effectively "do church" for the sake of hyped commercialism and  marketing, I do advocate the adoption of a Paulinian mindset:  in Jesus Christ there is no male nor female.



While some bask in the glow of their positions, standing on what has always been and sitting on their responsibilities, the harvest is rotting in the fields.  

Because of tradition.

While those who have called themselves warm the benches of the dugouts (oops - pulpits) of many churches, the truly called are precluded from going to bat or into the field.  

Because of tradition


While some man, woman, boy or girl would hear in the firm, strong, and gentle voice of another, a message of love, hope and salvation, he or she is instead subjected to the rantings of one who did not take the time to be still and listen for and prepare a message from the One who is waiting with open arms to receiving His children.

Because of tradition.


Traditions aren't all they're cracked up to be, according to Paul in the second chapter of Galatians.


News flash: Not only is it not about tradition, it's not about the rituals. And it's not even about the religion. But it's all about the relationship.


Keeping the Main Thing the Main Thing may require the emptying of oneself to allow room for the Main Thing to come in .  If your traditions take up too much space, there may not be room for the Main Thing.  


What baggage do you need to throw overboard to allow the Main Thing in your boat?


to be concluded in Part III.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Remembering Daddy

Lewis Hoxie, Jr. was born 102 years ago today, in his home on Detering Street just off what is now Memorial Drive.  At the time of his birth, his maternal grandfather, Anthony Gonder, owned acreage in that area, now priced well beyond my ability to pay.  I think of my father often.  Even though he died when I was 14 years old, he left a lot of himself in me.

For my short stint with Daddy, he was self-employed.  He rented a lot on Telephone Road near the Gulf Freeway (just north of the railroad track, next to Manning Machine Shop).  He sold soils, fertilizers and sand.

As I wrote "He sold soils, fertilizers and sand" I remember that I wrote of my father in my never-completed series REAL DADS OF THE DARKER NATION, so I went back to my archives and found the article, coincidentally published on November 5, 2008.  Rather than repeat myself here, I commend the reader to that blog.  [I've always wanted to "commend" someone to a writing -- it's what lawyers do when they're supposed to be presenting in those much-too pricey continuing legal education courses that are required for lawyers and board certified paralegals.  I've often wondered, why stand in front of me, all motor-mouthed, if all you're going to do is "commend" me to the paper?  Anyway, back to Daddy.

Stuff my Daddy taught me:

- If you see something that's not right, it's your responsibility to fix it, and if you can't, make the situation known so that it can be fixed.

- If you're big enough to invite someone to "whatever", you'd better be big enough to pick up the tab.

- If you want to eat, go to work.  Daddy once "floored" a guy who announced to my father that he was "retiring" and "going on welfare."

- Don't talk ugly around the children (especially his).  Daddy once jumped a fence after asking a guy next door to hold down the foul language because his kids were playing outside.  The guy's response was more vituperative utterings, so Daddy jumped the fence and belted him.

- Prayer meeting is not just for when we're at church.  So we had prayer at home -- the whole famn damily.


A man can only take so much.  A woman, too.


One of the great things about being a daughter of Lewis Hoxie, Jr., was being able to roam the neighborhood freely and not be bothered by anyone.   Just the suggestion that I might tell my daddy was sufficient for the biggest neighborhood bully to leave me alone.  Daddy wasn't as tall as my mom (and she was 5'8" back then), but he was stocky and as solid as a brick wall.

Was my Daddy perfect?  Absolutely not!  But he was my Daddy.  He is still my Daddy.  And even 40 years, 9 months and 1 week after his death, I still think of him.

There's Room at the Table -- If You Want There to Be

There was a wedding, attended by lots of folks connected to the bride, groom and their respective families via business relations, church membership, neighborhoods, and other ways. At the reception, Mr. & Mrs. Newbee staked out a table with other guests whom they knew. Upon leaving the the round table set for 10, to visit the buffet of sumptuous fare, Mrs. Newbee left her purse in her chair and Mr. Newbee left his hat in his.

Upon returning to "their" table, they found their chairs occupied by Mr. & Mrs. Ikkslusiv. Mr. Newbee's hat and Mrs. Newbee's purse had been placed on a ledge behind the Ikklusivs. As the Newbees stood, looking in wonderment, eyeing the empty chairs at the table, Mrs. Ikklusiv spread her arms wide and said these are all taken. Mrs. Newbee replied, yes, I know, they are ours. That's my purse and my husband's hat. And that sitting in front of you is my half-emptied water glass. Mr. Newbee leaned into his wife and said let's just find another table.

The Newbees turned around to the adjacent table, which was empty. They sat. Shortly thereafter, Mrs. Barnabas approached. As Mr. Newbee looked up and saw Mrs. Barnabas, he began to explain how they had been displaced. Well, these are tall take -- but we can make this work. Before either of the Newbees could react, Mrs. Barnabas began shifting chairs around.

As the evening progressed Mrs. Newbee sat back and surveyed the very full table. Her husband was deeply engaged in conversation with Mrs. Barnabas. All around the table were smiles and lots of chatter. No one seemed uncomfortable. In fact, there seemed to be ample elbow room, and everyone appeared to be having a great time of fellowship and celebration at this wedding feast.

I really don't believe it necessary to say anything else here.

Thanks to Pastor Steve Wells, whose dissection of Galatians 2:11-4 yesterday evening, prompted me to make this record of a true incident which happened not too long ago.

And I'm tempted to ask one question -- okay -- a compound question: Who is it that you would exclude from the table, and who would exclude you?