Saturday, February 14, 2009

'TIL DEATH?

Here we are again -- another designated day on which we are supposed to be programmed to act a certain way, make or utter certain sentiments, and otherwise lie, cheat and be hypocritical. And with tomorrow being Sunday, the hypocrisy will probably continue -- especially for those phoney church folks (if you're not one [phoney] you shouldn't get huffy or be offended) until Monday morning -- then all hell will break loose again and folks will be their normal nasty, discourteous, ungodly and hateful selves.


Another "Christian" holiday is now taken to the extreme.  Candy, jewelry, lingerie, "for-the-moment" proposals sure to morph into something putrid in 24 hours, cards that cost much too much money, dinners at fancy restaurants that cost some folks a day's pay, something new to wear for the occasion, perfume, blah, blah, blah.  Just one question about all these trappings:  Is there some real love involved here???  Just curious.


Alright -- that was a bit much for an introduction.  And then again, perhaps not.   How many of us get married and stay married -- the first time?  What about the second?   There was an average of 6,000 marriages per day in the United States in 2007.  Yet, depending on whose research you use, 41% to 50% of 1st marriages end in divorce, 60% to 67% of 2nd marriages end in divorce, and 73% to 74% of 3rd marriages end in divorce.   If those numbers are extrapolated, at some point one will get pretty doggone close to 100%.  So, what about the 6th marriage?  Or the 7th?  I suppose by the time one gets to the 7th, the divorce documents should be prepared a within a month or so the marriage ceremony and just kept in a computer file until needed.   (This has actually happened.)


Excuse me -- but do you see a trend here?  I suppose it gets easier everytime you do it -- that is, get a divorce.  It's like having children.  The first one generally involves some really hard, long, intense labor.  (I wouldn't know about that; I did Lamaze training, arrived at Rosewood at 7:30 a.m., had labor induced, and Sweet Pea arrived about 2:30 that afternoon).  But that 3rd or 4th just pops out with little effort.   (Don't know this from personal experience, just talking to folks who've had multiple babes.)


The problem here is that the more people resort to putting asunder what God has supposedly joined together, the more they treat others like used toilet paper.  (I meant to say that -- hopefully it will gross out someone and make one think about discarding one's mate in a callous manner.)  The bigger problem here is that when folks start tossing mates aside like so much trash (or, should I say, flushing them down the toilet?), they have already tossed God out of the mix -- that is, if He was ever invited to the marriage in the first place.


Here are a few suggestions about the "M" word.  Do each other and yourselves a favor:

  • if you're doing it just for the romance, DON'T.  
  • if it sounds like a good idea, and that's the only reason, DON'T.
  • if your motive is anything other than to build a life with someone else for the duration of your own, DON'T.
  • if you've done it before and treated it like a temporary assignment, DON'T.
  • if you're unwilling to resolve your conflicts quickly, DON'T.
  • if you cannot see past doing what you want to do, DON'T.
  • if you don't understand the concept of sharing, DON'T.
  • if you're doing it because she/he looks good to you, and that's all you can say, DON'T.  
  • if you're unwilling to truly invest yourself, DON'T.
  • if you think he/she will change, DON'T.
  • if you won't share yourself in the most intimate way, DON'T.
  • if you think you're both so good-looking that you will produce gorgeous kids, FORGET IT.
  • if you're just doing it to legitimize your lifestyle, DON'T.
  • if you think marriage vows are not to be lived out, DON'T.
  • if you don't love yourself, DON'T.